According to the new Brylcreem advert, the quality of Kevin Pietersen's hair not only allows him unprecedented access to Barack Obama's office in the White House, but it also gives him the confidence to spend his time there relaxing in the President's chair with his feet on the desk.
When not pretending to be The Most Powerful Man in the World, KP is also a cricketer with a dodgy achilles. Today he admitted that "it's tough when you come back from a long injury" and that he is finding it "quite hard at the moment". 85 runs in five innings (his return so far in South Africa) is not what we have come to expect, and it's difficult to see when he will be able to work on that rusty technique. Only two two-day games come before next week's first Test, and the rain continues to fall.
"I'm doing everything I can to get myself back to where I was," said KP. It seems that having good hair doesn't quite get you everywhere.